My first crush

In our culture, Teacher’s job is one of the most respected one. Falling in love with a teacher seems like a big sin. 

But!!!!!!

Crush is a crush, you don’t plan for it, it happens and that too on a first sight. Maybe you can blame it on your raging hormones.

I did my schooling in a small village on the outskirts of Delhi. I knew almost everyone in my village but I never found anyone that interesting to fall in love with. I guess I was very small and more focussed on  playing gilli-danda, khokho, flying kites, etc. I completed my 10th somehow, and the next big question was “Which College should I study”. I have heard about beautiful city girls and always wanted to study with them. I was able to convince my father to get me an admission in the city, but we could not afford staying in the city. The day I got admission in a city college, I was on cloud 9, dreaming all day of all the things I will be doing on my first day of college.

Then the day came, I dressed up neatly, my mom as usual applied oil on my hair and combed it, I borrowed talcum powder from my sister so I can look a little fair. But all those didn’t matter after a 2 hour bus drive. First thing I had to do was look for my roll number and identify my seat allocation. But I was more interested to know with whom I would be sharing my desk. Unfortunately it was a guy, that was the first disappointment for the day. But still I was all simile thinking of studying in the city in the midst of beautiful girls. I had to search for my class room and then my seat. I said hello to my fellow desk mate and we had our usual chat of what’s your name, where are you from, etc. Suddenly there was pin drop silence in the class, with the arrival of our chemistry teacher. Even now as I write after so many years, I could feel the butterflies in my stomach. Think of my situation when I saw her the first time. I still remember, she was wearing a red churidar with white and blue striped dupatta, matching red lipstick and big hanging earrings . She had a very good personality, cute face and she welcomed all of us with a warm smile. Her voice was so melodious, it still rings a bell in my ears. She had a roll call and asked each student to introduce themselves. When my turn came, I was speechless, I could not utter a single word. My teacher thought I came from a small village, so I would be nervous. She came near me to say don’t worry. But as she came closer to me, my heart started pumping more blood and that made me more speechless. I never had that kind of feeling before or after that incident. After that, several days passed and I kept eagerly waiting for my Chemistry class. 

I was not sure if this was normal and my family was not of the type where I can openly discuss it. But as I made more friends, and I learnt that I was not the only one, half of my class boys had the same feeling. That made me feel less guilty of having a crush on my teacher.